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Boring! Boring! My job is so boring. All day I stand here watching and waiting for people to talk to me. All day long, I see them pass by but they have so many other things to do. I wonder what it takes for someone to take the time to see me, to know that I am here waiting for them to talk specifically to me! Sigh. What a waste. I could be doing so many other things.

The crazy thing is that sometimes they do see me. When they do, usually I can make them happy if only for a few moments of time. They walk up, say a couple of impersonal sentences and…bang! I usually have to act like I’m spitting on them but they get the picture, I guess. Of course, then they walk away without so much as a thank you for making them happy. But, that’s part of my job. I guess it does have it’s charms and those wonderful moments when they stand there, looking expectantly. Then I spit. Sometimes it’s really fun because I don’t always spit. My mouth gets so dry that I can’t do it no matter what. What makes me happy is the time that the person is so obnoxious because then I really don’t feel so bad after all.

For once, I just wish I could do something else though. I look at the same scenery every day. The only thing that changes are the people. So, that’s not so bad I guess. People are interesting to watch. Hey, there was almost a car wreck that time. See, I am posted right at the intersection. That’s where I have to stand. I suspect I would make a really good Coldstream Guard, don’t you think? Ah, you already thought that’s what I am? No, that would be really interesting though.

My job is much simpler and more complex than that. I have responsibilities. I cannot be short. That will not do. Once I stood so long that I turned out short. It was horrible. People milling about, no one allowed near me. I was being treated like a criminal. But it got resolved.

Oh, my name? It’s Automatic Teller Machine. I have to go now. My public awaits. Perhaps you could come back again sometime? I have lots of stories for you.

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